“Is the grass always this green in Central Park?"

… is what I heard the plump and heavily bejeweled tourist say to the driver of her pedi-cab as he pedaled furiously past our running group. He smiled, catching my smirk as he turned back to reply, “Well, not in the winter.” She managed to snap a picture of the yoga class on the lawn before they clambered off.

I’ve started looking forward to running with the NYC training chapter in Central park during their Wednesday meets. Their group is broken into experience levels without the pressure of having to stay within a certain group level. This week, the beginners ran a little over 3 miles from Columbus Circle to the reservoir, Engineer’s Gate and back around the East Bend. Good even ground with gradual inclines. Intermediate took an extra lap around the reservoir and cut through half of the East Bend while the experts ran backwards to Philadelphia and back in the same amount of time.

As much as the city has complained about the cool start to the summer, it has made for great training weather. The grass has been the greenest I’ve ever seen in the park and the air for once smells fresh and clean. Good introduction to the lungs during our “Base Building” weeks. The first 4 weeks of the 15 week training program primarily focuses on technique and improving overall ability.

That means during our runs we’re focusing on stride and breathing. On the 6-day a week schedule, I’m running on Sundays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays. Swims for Base Building is also all about technique/stroke and re-learning how to breathe. Those are on Mondays, Thurs, and one of the weekend days (extra on my side because it’s the scariest part for me!) Biking is twice a week, Tuesdays and Saturdays. Making those thigh muscles Thoroughbred strong with hill drills. One of the girls training for the Nation’s Triathlon (Washington DC) sighed with contentment blithely stating DC was nice and flat. (ugh.) They didn’t name parts of Westchester “Mount something-or-another” for no reason.

Tomorrow is Brick. That means a bike GTS (Group Training Session) followed by a run. Good to mimic what is to come. With all the rain we’ve been having, scheduling GTS has been tentative. Workouts will continue in the rain but cancelled with thunder and lightning. I imagine myself as Lt.Dan in the crow’s nest of Forrest Gump’s boat yelling at God for a challenge in the storm.

Enough of the boring schedule updates; what’s the latest Triathlon Newbie embarrassing moment? Must have been during cool-down core workout in the muddy grass of Central Park as everyone quietly meditates deep in elbow plank and I blurt out, “My patch of grass smells funny.”

When All I Want to Say Is "On Your Left"

A fitting end to the first week of training was the first bike meet. I had thought the awkward initial scrutiny may be over, but I'm getting used to being proved wrong time and time again.

It turns out to be a beautiful Saturday morning at the parking lot of SUNY Purchase as the group meets at 7:30. Light stretching, light gabbing, the occasional tire pump being passed around. Never had been part of an organized bike group, I looked at everyone's gear from the corner of my eye. 

Keep in mind that all the articles, websites, intro meetings, and the very handy "Your First Triathlon" book by Joe Friel tell the Tri newbie that anything on two wheels and a pedals will work for a first Triathlon. No need to dump $1000 into a fancy new road bike if you already have something handy. Its a quick read and very user friendly.

What Joe doesn't prepare the average reader for is the scrutiny and embarrassment of being picked out of the group during intro's of the prime example of "what gear not to have." Poland spring sport bottles - a no-no. Too awkward to pull out of the cage while riding. Make sure to have the sport bottles with the little pop-top. Oh, and to "keep the nipple up" at all times for a quick suck.

I was too busy trying to hide the flush rising to my face to make my standard side retort regarding the nipple comment. The coach continued on to point out to the rest of the group (who apparently didn't need this instruction since they all had the right equipment) how my street sneakers would not provide as much uphill power as the more fancier clip pedals and matching shoes would. To top the embarrassment off with a cherry, I was asked to go ahead of the pack during sprints under the pretense of, "its not your athletic ability that puts you at a disadvantage, its just that your equipment may hinder your progress versus others."

Everyone else's goal in the pack? To catch up to my 30 second head start. Greeeat. 

Nonetheless, I plowed through the morning wholeheartedly. Agony came in the form of hill drills. Climb the same hill 5 times; odd numbers sitting down, even numbers standing up.  Your break comes as you speed down to the bottom. My motivation was simply not seeing the cyclists that zoomed down the hill while I climbed pass me within the next minute.

Frustration replaces the burning thighs during sprints as cyclists on their thousand dollar rides yell from behind you "on your left" to let you know they're passing. I'm just patting myself on the back for investing in a Hybrid rather than trudging along on my tank-like mountain bike. 

Weary and craving caffeine, Erin and I pack up and search for the nearest Dunkin Donuts. (Cause we're American, and America runs on Dunkin, was our motto.) After a close and muddy encounter with a loose bike rack, declining help from a strange car pulling over to assist on the Hutch and giant iced coffees, we headed off to the swim portion of our day humming Talking Head's "Pscho killer, quest que cest..." 

Advil Liquid Gels - the every pain reliever

Lets put the pharmaceutical claim to the test and see if it really works. Today has got to be the worse training day I've had so far. And I'm sure there are many more to follow. But let's talk about how today sucked.

Pulling myself from the warm dry sanctuary of my bed around 5:30 am, I step out into the dreary, wet, cold, and miserable morning. Five minutes into my AM bike, I realize I've underdressed and am freezing in the misting rain. But hey, I'm already out of the house so might as well keep going. What should have been an easy 6 mile ride turned into the torture of the morning. My saving grace was a silent moment around the duck pond. 6 am and not a soul in sight.  A tender moment until I realized I still had the entire day ahead of me.

Thursdays are the last push of the week before my one day off on Friday. That means double the training. The dreaded swim later in the evening. Without the crowd and scrutinizing eyes of the coaches, I set my own pace. Proud that I accomplished around 20 laps with 40 minutes, I thought I ended the day on a high note. Until I passed a note on the wall explaining pool lengths. 76 laps = 1 mile. 

Good lord. How do I not drown?

So now, for some odd reason, I have the urge to chug the entire bottle of Advil. Because there's not enough bananas in the world that can mend my legs by Saturday. Man. This day sucked like the Yankees....

The Mental Game - discovering how much you really like your own company

RUN FORREST, RUN... was what I kept muttering under my breath as today's training took a 4 1/2 mile loop around Central Park. That's because I had the brilliant idea that training without music will "prepare" me for the real mental game.

What I discovered was that not too many things run through my head while engaged in physical activity. Some might consider this a great escape - a mental retreat - from having to worry or think. I'm just concerned I don't actually find myself interesting.

JPMorgan was hosting their corporate challenge on the main road, so our little pack started from Columbus Circle, down the bridal path (watch out for poop!) and a couple of loops around the reservoir. Each loop is 1.5 miles plus a mile or so along the bridal path back to Columbus Circle.

The reservoir is a tranquil, scenic route, perfect for meditation. Perfect for one to reflect on how truly they hate themselves. I think it was the boredom that hit first. Just the constant "in through your nose, out through your mouth" sounds I could hear myself make. And how the monotony of each step was broken up by puddle... puddle... dog poop... puddle. I tried focusing on the runner ahead of me, matching strides all the while thinking, "are my legs that much shorter?"

Self-loathing sinks in around mile 3 and I move from humming show tunes to yelling in my brain. What the heck are you doing? God I can't believe I have to do this all summer. I suck. Is everyone ahead of me? I just want to stop. If I stop I can sit on that bench. Just 2 minutes, no one will notice. My calves feels funny. Am I cramping? Ooh ice cream. I wish I could just push ahead of this pack. I'm tired. How much looooonger? Can we all JUST STOP. Don't stop, don't stop, don't stop, don't think.

Ew, was that poop I just stepped in? 

Nutrition Seminar - I can eat ALL THAT!?

I've never worked with a nutritionist before, much less had a professional tell me what I should or should not eat without trying to sell me something. Gail Flanagan, MS, RD, gave a good insight on nutrition for athletes. 

My short attention span gathered the following; EXERCISE = YOU GET TO EAT FOOD! Who has been hiding this wonderful diet secret? Is there a patent pending? Has the FDA locked this secret up with the Ark of the Covenant in a military vault to make room for diet pills?

A happy sigh settled about the group as we ferociously scribbled "potatoes", "honey", "pasta", "REAL sugar" under the GOOD FOOD columns. I poke a hole in my paper where I placed exclamation points next to CARBS.

Gail tells us the myth of the low/no carb diet and how you can spot an Atkins fan by bad breath. (Sorry to break it to you folks, an excess of protein leads to increased ammonia in the system. And you know what ammonia smells like...) The right amount of protein is just fine - lean meats, turkey, chicken - to recover muscles from intensified training. But don't expect this to work in your favor for tomorrow's round of drills and training. A diet of 50-60% complex carbs is broken down to glucose and deeper stores of glycogen. Your body's jet fuel when faced with that quarter mile uphill push.

No to "low-fat" anything. Salad dressing, yogurt, soda, you name it. Low-fat products are laden with artificial sweeteners and high-fructose corn syrup. Don't pay attention to the media brainwashing commercials claiming HFCY is not bad because its made from corn. Bottom line, it is a cheap alternative for sugar (hence Pepsi's limited edition Throwback, Made with Real Sugar!), and the last thing you want fueling your well oiled machine (I mean your stomach) is cheaply made food. Regular Italian style dressing is better off since olive oil is a good source of Monounsaturated fat. 

We get to the part of the information sheet about water consumption and the first description states "A tasteless, colorless, odorless fluid." Hmm. Was this in reference to NYC tap water...? This part wasn't anything new. Drink water. Plenty of it. You would think with all the pool water I drank last night, I'd be set for the rest of the summer.

So this sloth of an eater (it takes me HOURS to finish a meal) will now need to consume the following on a daily basis - full breakfast (coffee A.O.K. yay!), mid-morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack, and a full dinner with dessert.  That means I'll always be eating!

Oh. And those energy gels speeds up digestion due to the caffeine content. That means test them out during training first. You know, to avoid pooping yourself during the race. Classy.

baby's first day at the pool

Yesterday my training partner Erin (a coworker who convinced me to join the Tri) and I logged 20 miles biking in Westchester. Not a bad ride, but we found ourselves sitting on one butt cheek at a time all day.

Nervous and excited, we made our way to our first swim meet at the White Plains YMCA and met our coaches. It was like freshman year of high school - except everyone is half-naked in spandex. Awkward hellos for the newbies (me) and high fives and jeering from the veterans.

Erin having been a life guard "back in the day", took off like a dolphin. I however got pulled aside into the kiddy pool group and was handed a swim kick board. How embarrassing. After several drills rolling side to side, elbows high, ear and cheek to water, I got over the freakiness of having water in your mouth when taking a breath. Once and awhile I met Erin at the end of a lane and we exchanged pleasantries such as "should've quit smoking earlier" or "how fast does a doggy paddle get you across the Long Island sound?"

Severely waterlogged, hair smelling like a condom (unused, unflavored), and off-balanced with water in ear, I learned key important factors today;

1. Look down in stroke - look at horizon during breath
2. Keep one cheek and one eye in water at all times
3. Don't freak in deep water, just keep even breathing
4. Pick up stroke in high angle and fluid reach forward
5. Watch out for the warm spots in an unheated pool......

The Beginning

I've signed up for my very first Triathlon and I admit I'm scared out of my wits. Its the Westchester Tri on September 27, 2009, an Olympic length involving almost 1 mile swim, 26 mile bike, and 6 mile run. 

Our first organized training meet is this Monday for swim at the White Plains YMCA and this will be the first time in decades that I don a one piece swimsuit. Prancing around the dressing room of Models, I remember now why I've never worn a one-sie. Tri gear over all is JUST NOT CUTE. Beware all prissy gals.

Finally traded in the mountain bike for a comparable road bike and I plan to break it in with a 10 mile morning ride along the Bronx River Parkway. As eager as I am to hop right into the full length distances (sarcasm inserted here), building endurance in the first few weeks seems to be the key to the scheduled meets.

Stay tuned...